Another chapter in Grimm’s (Environmentally Amended) Fairy Tales…

Once upon a time big bad energy companies did something really really bad. They wanted to drill for natural gas where (gasp) natural gas actually existed! Can you imagine raping the ground for something natural? Anyway, these big bad energy companies were of course enabled by and codependent on really evil companies like Halliburton (where Dick Cheney used to be CEO, dontcha know).

Anyway, when the big bad energy companies came to town, they wanted to use something more precious than birth control pills: They wanted our…water (oh no!). Yes little boys and girls, energy companies that drill for natural gas use lots and lots of water, which means you won’t have any to drink, nor any to flush the toilet, nor any to put out a fire in your house (a fire caused by global warming of course). And worst of all, you won’t have any water for your swimming pool!

In order to get enough water to drill, these big bad energy companies asked to buy it from local towns and villages, who had more than enough for the townsfolk. The good leaders from almost all the towns and villages refused to sell any water to the big bad energy companies. But there was one bad leader who did (boo). But don’t worry little kiddies, ’cause really good organizations with names like Citizen Action and the ACLU rode into town and voted the bad leader out of office, and sued the local town and energy companies into the next millennium and saved the day (yeah!).

The End.

Editor’s Note: Although a few liberties have been taken with the above fairy tale, please read Johnson City OKs water sale to gas drillers in today’s Press & Sun-Bulletin and tell me if your intelligence is as insulted as mine.

Technorati Tags: natural gas drilling, Binghamton, Broome County, environmental fairy tales, waste water for natural gas drilling